I sold cars in another life. Because I like cars, I didn't last very long. It was excruciating. What Jim writes above is true. For some dealers their ideal scenario is that you are the first dealer they visit because statistically these are the most profitable sales. They want to demo you in the car they want to put you in, and if they have too many silver cars on the lot right now, "Put them in a silver one."
Needless to say, the new car buying experience can take some of the joy out of getting a new car. I don't think this is the case with all brands, but I do think VW has problems with its dealers in the US, and I don't think they'll reach near premium status unless they invest in training with a long-term perspective.
The dealer closest to me went under new ownership a couple of years ago and I don't think they are the better for it. Their sales staff has a very high turn over. In casual chit chat, they don't know about the cars and seem to think they can tell people anything, as if people don't do their homework. I'll be surprised if I get my car there unless I walk in and they happen to have exactly what I want.
I live in a metropolitan area with several VW dealers. When I sold cars, I remember them saying "People are looking for a salesperson to put them in the car." To an extent, I think this is true. I don't buy a new car very often. If I'm going to sit down and work a deal over the course of a couple of hours, I think it should be reasonably pleasant. It doesn't' take long to size up a salesperson who will try to work you for an extra hour or two over $50. For some people, it's sport.
The business has changed a lot and sometimes I think dealers are the last one's to accept this. Even if you find a sales person who has been around a while, they may not have good people skills. (There is a salesperson on VWVortex who has nearly flamed customers on threads. Personally, I think he's foolish to negotiate deals in such a public setting.) With the last new car I bought, the nearly fuming sales manager went through a long list of additional items he'd hoped to tack on to the sale. (Undercoating in California? It was embarrassing.)
I always ask how long the person has been selling VWs. If they've been there for a couple of years and not jumped from dealer to dealer, that's a good sign that they'll last beyond their first poor month, and are interested in creating good will and getting referrals.
Fortunately, we now have car buying services. There's just no car I want badly enough to endure bad theater, especially since I've been on the other side of the fence and know the kinds of games to be played.